Bought gummy vitamins, which tipped this vegan nonsense from slow death into something a bit more invigorating. A less-slow death, maybe. Although there are probably horse knuckles in the gummy vitamins, now that I'm thinking about it, but whatever. I am only impersonating a person with dietary restrictions.
Started doing sit-ups and dangling from chin-up bar. Went on night walk and listened to Led Zeppelin while staring up at the stars and running from feral cats. Felt pretty good this morning while checking off my holds list at work. Scratched nose with working end of pen. Didn't notice. Nobody told me. For two hours. NO VEGAN COOKIES FOR YOU PEOPLE.
Well, I say that, but we have a potluck coming up and I'm bringing cookies. I really love all the little cookies. Vegans go through a lot of effort to fuck up a cookie, with flax and germ and soaked cashews and sugar scraped from plants that don't like producing sugar, but a regular egg-free chocolate cookie with lazy processed ingredients is just fine. And then you can brag like an asshole at your staff potluck and people will think you're really fit even though you are obviously just eating cookies and calling it a diet.
AND - guess how much weight I've lost? Any guess will do, actually, because I don't know. I've been living off of cookies and I'm afraid to get on the scale.
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