The Year in short

In 2009, I:

* Lost my Great-Grandma.
* Gained 2 nephews and 2 boy cousins. Developing suspicions about nationwide epidemic of male sperm. (fault = corn syrup, probably.)
* Had one close call with death.
* Lost 10 lbs. Gained 4.
* Went to the opera with my mom.
* Was on the news; apologized to Anchorman McHandsomepants for 'turning into a squirrel'. (Smooth)
* Signed two book contracts, produced 42 illustrations. Did not work on graphic novel.
* Took up quilting and sewing, in continued efforts to Keep Busy and Not Think About Things.
* Knitted two cardigans and several useless hoodies for the baby, ripped out the fingerless gloves I discovered myself making for someone I oughtn't. Also knitted tiny mouse sweaters (ornaments) for mother-in-law, and retracted all the bad things I said about knitting scarfs.
* Slapped ex-husband in the face twice, cried 4 times.
* Learned to remove graffiti/skin with exciting chemicals.
* Made a new girlfriend. Womanfriend. Pal. (Why do men get "bromance"? "Ho-mance" is not so good.)
* Reconnected with cousins and uncle.
* Turned 30, with sense of relief. And bad hair cut.
* Ate terrible ceviche.
* Ate fantastic quail eggs.
* Read 3 books. Partway-read another 30 or so. Wrote a few chapters of 2.
* Accidentally weaned infant from just one side of my bosom.
* Cheered infant's learning to crawl and walk.
* Cheered Gavin's first ride on the motorcycle (no cheers for the second ride, when he tried to fall asleep and slip off).
* Enjoyed 8 different kinds of home-brewed beer.
* Didn't throw up.
* Resisted making an ass of myself on the internet. Pretty much.
* Caught poop with my hand.

And look! One of my hobos gave me a muu muu.



And now I can add "got body lice" to that list.

Hopes for new year include:

* No family or friends dying.
*Finding something on tv that ignites hysteria and obsession, the way Battlestar did for the first 2 seasons.
* Losing last 5 lbs. Ok, 9. My aunt sent a box of Big Turk, it couldn't be helped.
* Seeing old friends and family on the mainland, buying overpriced crap from Purl Soho and that fish & chips place we saw on the food network.
* Finding self back on Oahu during bronze-casting season.
* Working on book #4. Maybe effing GRAPHIC NOVEL.
* Getting back into yoga.
* No, fuck yoga.
* Using my bag of plastic eyeballs and noses.
* Finishing the UFOs in my sewing cupboard; actually trying projects from my collection of craft books. Probably not the one for menstrual pads, though.
* No more babies. At least not until mankind learns to produce female sperm again. 

* Eating a new food. Maybe some exotic cheese, or grits.

You get the idea.