LIES.
I am trying to cast on my first shawl/triangular neck thing ever and this makes no sense WHO DOES THIS.
Crochet chain 4 stitches pick up and knit 2 stitches through bumps on the reverse side knit 7 rows TURN 90 DEGREES CLOCKWISE KNIT 1 STITCH IN EACH RIDGE UNRAVEL YARN PLACE LIVE STITCHES ON NEEDLE WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS.
All this because I have determined after 5 weeks of coughing and two runs of antibiotics and two chest x-rays that I am probably not dying of tuberculosis, but very probably allergic to the tweed sweater I am knitting.
Which I have run out of yarn for at the fucking COLLAR. And I can't afford to order another ball of this death tweed for another month. So I'm trying to use stuff I already have for other stuff. Which may or may not also try to kill me. The likelihood that it WILL kill me increases with these instructions.
Which I have run out of yarn for at the fucking COLLAR. And I can't afford to order another ball of this death tweed for another month. So I'm trying to use stuff I already have for other stuff. Which may or may not also try to kill me. The likelihood that it WILL kill me increases with these instructions.
RAWR.
Instead of knitting, I will jab the needles into this man who refuses to move out.
The sweater looks amazing :) The 90 degree turns freak me out too! It's none of my business but I would be concerned about the side effects of the tenting episode...my daughter gets that cough from cigarette smoke residue when visiting a home or car where smokers have been. Take Care!!!
ReplyDeleteYeah, I wondered about the tenting, too. And there are wool allergies in the family. Our matriarchs have hips like Vikings and lungs like old socks.
ReplyDeletexoxo
It's the crochet+knitting thing that would kill me. I can crochet up a storm - knit? The needles have minds of their own.
ReplyDeleteStab the man for me.
It still amazes me that you can take all of that seemingly foreign wording and turn it into something wearable, but I have to ask, if you're allergic to it while making it, won't you react to it while wearing it?
ReplyDeleteAnd stab him in the eye some thing good!
Yep, it will have to be a gift - but I have to finish it, it's too close to being done. Right after I posted this, I dug in my knitting basket and discovered one more ball of the stuff. I had a moment of elation and ire so profound I think the ceiling opened up and light beamed down on me.
ReplyDeleteI waved the needles at the man in a vaguely menacing manner. He got me some scotch. It's a slow, undramatic transition, but it's underway.
Too bad you won't be able to wear it, it's lovely. And that never happens, finding more yarn like that! It's a sign....of what, I don't know, but it's a sign!
ReplyDeleteYeah well, just be careful 'cause our friend Rockygrace knows what's it's like to have neighbors bring her food in times of them wanting some favor, and Scotch is even more bribe-ier (not that I'm saying he's bribing you, but hopefully you know what I mean.)
Seems to be the time for slow, undramatic transitions. I feel you there, though I may have just jumped off a cliff tonight. That's speeding things up a bit, though I don't know how smart it was.
Oh no! There's something to be said for jumping in with both feet. At least there's momentum on your side.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, we must beware the drachenfutter. First it's scotch, and then suddenly 5 years have gone by. Wily.
Indeed I am not usually a "both feet" kind of girl, and I was trying to avoid jumping from the pan into the fire, yet I didn't notice that I was only weighing the options of jumping from point A to point D, instead of taking baby steps in between. But there was some thing a bit exhilerating about standing on the edge of that cliff. I wasn't playing it safe any more, because there is no less pain in safety, I have found, I really had nothing to lose. What I can gain is some belief in myself that I don't need any one else to make things right again and to be who I really want to be.
ReplyDeleteMay you not lose another 5 years, my dear! Cheers to that!
Hi Mama!
ReplyDeleteI am sitting here contemplating how awesome you knit. You seem incredibly awesome on all fronts.
Last I checked in with your knitting, you were only knitting with acrylic because you were allergic. Can you knit with wool now, and even wear some of it? I have lots and lots of stash, too much to knit at the rate I knit. Imagine the opposite of how youʻve been knitting lately. Wanna make me a hat?
I adore your writing style on the blog. Itʻs just so perfectly not Hana Maui hippie but rather arch British humor that happens to be situated there.
xo Flames