buff bods and poo of all sorts

After four days of hauling boxes, walking up and down stairs, dragging ankle-children, and moving furniture, I felt as if I had been beaten head-to-toe with The Big Book of Beating. Got on the scale, and cheered a bit. "I lost a pound!" Mike pulled off his shirt. "Oh, look at that, I'm buff again." Jerk. The hamcat returned, appearing suddenly behind me as I was flexing in the closet mirror and making me jump out of pose with her pissy "RAWR". Then she went and pooped in the tub. Gee, I am so glad she is back. 

It has been determined that our porch is just about the greatest hang-out place in the world. The view at night The view at dawn I keep making heavenly-chorus "Aahhhhh!" noises whenever I see that. (The sunrise)  

 

Have decided not to do the Master Cleanse. Mostly because you have to drink about a gallon of salt water and spend 4-6 hours pooping, and I would end up having to do it with an audience of cats and a toddler - all of whom think it is their directive in life to pry me off the toilet and see what's going on in there. While having a cat's head suddenly jam down between your butt and the toilet seat is kind of funny at first, it is also alarming and absolutely horrifying. But then you can lean backward and pin their head in the toilet, and it is funny again - until it is scratchy and painful. So instead of purging the toxins with foul liquids, I will attempt something much more difficult: real food. No artificial color, sweetener, corn syrup, refined sugar, bleached flour, red meat, booze, caffeine, or massive quantities of salt. For, say, 2 weeks. You'd think this would be easy, living somewhere with no fast food or grocery stores. No, it is not. So far today: coffee with agave and milk (good. Except for, you know, the caffeine) hash browns and scrambled eggs (good) 2 sour cream and onion Ritz pretzel-crackers (fail) Kashi natural-whatsit snack bar (good) black tea with splenda and old milkshake as creamer (fail) Anticipating higher success rate after buying groceries/banning forced cracker feedings by co-worker. (Forced!) Also there is this: 

Dubbed the Invisibility Cloak, owing to its complete lack of color and therefore INVISIBILITY. No more getting caught by co-workers and being forced to do paperwork for me!